{"id":514683,"date":"2019-01-10T15:22:52","date_gmt":"2019-01-10T21:22:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/countthekicks.org\/2019\/01\/the-story-i-dont-share-but-should\/"},"modified":"2021-01-27T09:46:11","modified_gmt":"2021-01-27T15:46:11","slug":"the-story-i-dont-share-but-should","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/countthekicks.org\/2019\/01\/the-story-i-dont-share-but-should\/","title":{"rendered":"The Story I Don\u2019t Share but Should"},"content":{"rendered":"

When getting to know my family, the first thing people notice is that my daughter is adopted and that my kids are six months apart. \u00a0Naturally, there are questions, and yes! We are that family that you hear about that tried to have children on their own, couldn\u2019t, then decided to adopt and then poof! \u00a0(as if it were that easy) I got pregnant. People snicker with a kind heart, and say,<\/span> I know a family like that<\/span><\/i> or <\/span>I bet it happened because you stopped stressing over it.<\/span><\/i> \u00a0I usually just smile and agree, not wanting to share my whole story and make people feel uncomfortable, but really, I should share my story. \u00a0The story about what happened <\/span>before<\/span><\/i> these two beautiful souls entered our lives. My story that could save lives. <\/span><\/p>\n

Newly married at the age of 25 in 1999, moving to a different state, buying our first home, and starting a new job as a Pediatric Intensive Care nurse at Mayo Clinic, you could say I was going through some changes. \u00a0But finding out I was pregnant, in a patient\u2019s room (who was gravely ill BTW) was the biggest change to end that calendar year. Overall, my pregnancy was what most clinicians would say was typical, but really pregnancy is not typical. \u00a0Can I get an AMEN!?!?! It is an exhilarating, scary, fantastic roller coaster ride, with puking and screaming, and crying tears of joy, and yelling \u201cI want to get off this *&% ride!!!!!\u201d All worth it in the end when you get to hold your precious baby and take them home, at least for most women.<\/span><\/p>\n

My due date came and went, my bag was packed, the nursery done, I was anxious!! \u00a0And big!!! And ready to be done. All the time thinking about what needed to be finished, or cleaned, or organized, and not thinking about what my baby was doing. \u00a0When I realized he hadn\u2019t been moving, I would poke at my abdomen, drink cold water, not thinking that I should go in and get checked. Now, being a healthcare provider, I am not proud of the fact that it took me some time to get myself to go in. Thinking I was just an overly cautious, first-time mother-to-be, some would even say paranoid. \u00a0But that sense that something was wrong was growing fast, and as much as I didn\u2019t want to listen to it, it was getting louder and louder\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

I go to the hospital and they tell me <\/span>we will just take a listen <\/span><\/i>\u2026 silence. <\/span>Let\u2019s get an ultrasound<\/span><\/i>, silence \u2026\u00a0 <\/span>Let\u2019s get someone in here to double check<\/span><\/i>. \u00a0And then reality strikes, it\u2019s too late. \u00a0<\/span>I\u2019m so sorry<\/span><\/i>\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n

Being told I had to go through labor, not having my epidural work, finding out I\u2019m allergic to penicillin the hard way, was nothing compared to the emotional pain it carried. \u00a0Every time my husband called a family member, it was gut-wrenching to hear their reaction for the first time. Every time a healthcare worker came into my room, the look of pure solemn and grief on their faces knowing they drew the short straw today was unbearable. \u00a0And finally, every time an hour went by, I was hoping, praying, that they were wrong, that I would hear a heartbeat, or feel a little kick. I made deals with God, if only you give him back to me, I\u2019ll be a better person. I was angry — I did everything right, and I don\u2019t get to take my son home!!! \u00a0But alas, the moment came, he was born, and the silence was maddening \u2026. Just silence. <\/span><\/p>\n

The what ifs are endless and crushing, but as time goes by (Charlie would have been 19 this year) the pain softens. \u00a0You never forget, but it doesn\u2019t consume you anymore. After going through my own grief, I really wanted to help others. \u00a0I would get connected with other women who had gone through a similar experience, and it was helpful for both. But perhaps, if I can help prevent other women from going through this, that is the key. \u00a0That is what heals you and makes this life we all share eventful and worthwhile. So when I heard about Count the Kicks<\/em> through Healthy Birth Day, Inc.<\/em> I knew I wanted to help. <\/span><\/p>\n

Count the Kicks<\/em> is a public health campaign to prevent stillbirth by tracking babies\u2019 movements in the third trimester of pregnancy. Research shows a change in fetal movement can be the earliest and sometimes only indication that a baby is in distress in utero. More than 24,000 pregnancies end in stillbirth every year in the U.S., according to the CDC. If my story makes others uncomfortable in order to save other women from going through this, then it\u2019s worth it. <\/span><\/p>\n

What I like about the Count the Kicks<\/em> app is that it gives parents-to-be the ability to download and send kick counting data directly from the app and is available in 12 languages. It is completely free, available at iTunes and Google Play online app stores, and has been downloaded 125,000 times in all 50 states and 140 countries. What\u2019s most impressive are the stories of babies saved because moms used the app to track their babies\u2019 movements in the third trimester.<\/span><\/p>\n

Here\u2019s a quote from a success story. \u201cWe saved her life by using the app and coming in. We are extremely thankful that the app exists and that Ruby is here with us. I can\u2019t say thank you enough, because she is alive,\u201d said Emily Eekhoff, who used the <\/span>Count the Kicks<\/span><\/i> app to track her baby\u2019s movements, and ultimately help save her baby in 2017.<\/span><\/p>\n

The what-ifs came naturally back, <\/span>what if I had this technology, would he be here? \u00a0<\/span><\/i>\u00a0But instead of thinking about the what-ifs to my impossible question, now it\u2019s what if all pregnant women had this app and used it, would stillbirths be a thing of the past??? \u00a0What a happy ending to my story it would be!!! I\u2019m hopeful that nineteen years later, being a <\/span>Count the Kicks<\/span><\/i> volunteer, I can help spread this important education to as many expectant parents as I can to make sure their birth stories end happily \u00a0\u00a0Thank you.<\/span><\/p>\n

By Amy Romanin, RN, community volunteer, wife to Matthew, and mother to Charlie, Lily & Jack<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When getting to know my family, the first thing people notice is that my daughter is adopted and that my kids are six months apart. \u00a0Naturally, there are questions, and yes! We are that family that you hear about that tried to have children on their own, couldn\u2019t, then decided to adopt and then poof! 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